Fear and Love: What's Missing?

What’s Missing? 

In Blog 1, we talked about our reasons for writing this series On Fear and Love. In part, it’s based on our belief that some of you gain knowledge or have an experience that makes you want to seek more out of life. Curiosity rises into your conscious state of understanding, but it’s accompanied by the frustration of not knowing what it is. You can’t quite put your finger on it…a feeling of discomfort with the way things are. You’re looking for a how-to book, a checklist or the latest social media meme for the answers. 

Maybe you’re not aware of it yet, but there’s a feeling underneath and you’re just waiting for someone to put it into words so you can say, “Yes! That’s what is missing.” You’re headed toward it in the way spiritual things work; you read it and know that’s what you were thinking of without realizing it. There is something within us, an energy transference between us that helps bring these things to light. 

Starting a Journey 

John Maxwell’s book, Everyone Communicates Few Connect (2010: Thomas Nelson Publishers) teaches, “What the most effective people do differently”. He shares three important skills to build one’s capability to create lasting and meaningful relationships: 

1. How to connect well with others and why that matters. 
2. How to establish a bond with your audience (one person or thousands). 
3. How to inspire others to take action. 

There’s more to the world than just talking to others, following the rules, getting the job, the house, the 2.5 kids, two dogs and a cat. Work at being humble, don’t tell lies, it’s all in there, but understand that the thing in there holding it all together is internal. It’s a piece of us trying to fully express and unfold ourselves. If you think the world owes you something; that you can win by playing the game better or manipulating the rules to get ahead, our teaching is not for you. Our blogs won’t hold your interest and you won’t get anything out of them. 

But if you are on the continuum moving toward being your authentic self – a sincere and honest person – this is for you. If you are searching because you know there’s more for you, you’re awake and aware, wondering and curious about what’s out there, our coaching serves its highest function: To give you the knowledge and framework to sink your mental teeth into. Recognize the signs of fear and respond by stepping out of the skewed belief mindset that you must be broken because you feel bad or afraid. 

What’s the point? We are passionate about equipping you with hope and the gumption – and the mental resources – you need to challenge yourselves. You’re not broken, and you don’t need to be fixed but until you believe that and decide to change, nothing will happen. The only one that can step forward and do it is you. 

Fear vs. Love 

One of the myths about fear and love is that they can be visualized on a horizontal line with fear at one end and love at the other, in opposition to each other. Nobody on planet Earth experiences and expresses all fear or all love; we are all somewhere in between and we ebb and flow between the two. You can also think about it in terms of a dichotomy which serves to divide opposing concepts. There will be more about this in the coming weeks, so please stay tuned. It’s very important. 

Leaders Inspire 

A big part of getting to what Maxwell called, “The Inspiration Equation” is understanding enough about what people need to know, see and feel to motivate them to take meaningful action. That’s the part of the leader. Our individual part is to understand what those energies are stirring up inside of us (symptoms), to identify what the symptoms represent, to decide if we want to take action (change) to alter our circumstances (outcome).  

Again, we’re talking about fear, and the language that’s used to describe it. The either/or mindset requires that you take an absolute view of fear: You’re afraid and need to protect yourself, or you’re not and you don’t. That’s the lie that’s embedded in fear that we talked about in the first entry of this blog series. Remember, fear is not “wrong”, but you will feel it at some point in life, and you won’t have the skills to overcome it. And why would you? People are not trained to recognize the source of fear and develop the awareness to understand and resolve it successfully.   

We are called to help you find ways to express fear and love and acknowledge other emotions that operate on the same spectrum. If you want to talk with us, we promise to listen.